So today marks 4 months sober for me. And I've got to admit that I didn't think I'd make it this far. I am proud of myself, but still fearful of failure.
I have been under a lot of stress lately. Between work and home, I feel like I can't seem to just get a break. I do, however, feel like I have been handling it very well. I haven't turned to alcohol and I feel like I've maintained control over my emotions fairly well. I've opted to stay to myself as much as possible. There are a couple of people that I have kept close, but for the most part, I feel like I have become quite distant from everyone. And yet, I still feel like I can't seem to catch a few minutes alone. I know that it's all because of the stress, so I'm just trying to deal with it.
I feel like I have taken a few steps backwards, honestly. For a little bit there, I was motivated and positive and even happy. Now, I don't know what has happened. I have lost my motivation and I am not really thinking very positively. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm happy...I am...I just don't feel like myself. I don't know what's going on. I just kind of feel blah. Not sad, not happy, not mad...just kind of blank. It's weird.
So yea...there is is...Merry Christmas?
